Monday, June 07, 2004
A few Muslim jokes
From Ethnic Jokes Set 4 - Submitted by Don, Hagerstown, Md.
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Who says the Muslims aren't funny?
Here are some jokes from that crazy Muslim standup comic..... ladies and gentlemen please give it up for.... Goffaq Yussef!
Good evening gentlemen, and get out, ladies. You have no right to be having a good time.
On my flight to New York there must have been a Jew in the bathroom the entire time. There was a sign on the door that said "occupied."
What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? Nothing! You told her twice already!
How many Muslims does it take to change a light bulb. None! They sit in the dark forever and blame the Jews for it!
Did you hear about the Broadway play, 'The Palestinians'? It bombed!
What do you call a first-time offender in Saudi Arabia? Lefty!
Did you hear about the Muslim strip club? It features full facial nudity!
Why do Palestinians find it convenient to live on the West Bank? Because it's just a stone's throw from Israel!
Why are Palestinian boys luckier than American boys? Because every Palestinian boy will get to join a rock group!
A small plane carrying Yassir Arafat and all his top lieutenants crashes and all aboard are killed. Who is saved? The Palestinian people!
Two Israelis are in an elevator when the doors open and a Palestinian gets on. After the doors close, the Palestinian lets out a huge, noisy fart. The doors open again and the Palestinian gets off. One Jew looks at the other, wipes his brow and says, "Thank God! Must have been a dud!"
What does the sign say above the nursery in a Palestinian maternity ward? "Live ammunition."
A Palestinian girl says to her mommy, "After Abdul blows up, can I have his room?"
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Ba-boom-boom-CRASH!
(0) comments
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Who says the Muslims aren't funny?
Here are some jokes from that crazy Muslim standup comic..... ladies and gentlemen please give it up for.... Goffaq Yussef!
Good evening gentlemen, and get out, ladies. You have no right to be having a good time.
On my flight to New York there must have been a Jew in the bathroom the entire time. There was a sign on the door that said "occupied."
What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? Nothing! You told her twice already!
How many Muslims does it take to change a light bulb. None! They sit in the dark forever and blame the Jews for it!
Did you hear about the Broadway play, 'The Palestinians'? It bombed!
What do you call a first-time offender in Saudi Arabia? Lefty!
Did you hear about the Muslim strip club? It features full facial nudity!
Why do Palestinians find it convenient to live on the West Bank? Because it's just a stone's throw from Israel!
Why are Palestinian boys luckier than American boys? Because every Palestinian boy will get to join a rock group!
A small plane carrying Yassir Arafat and all his top lieutenants crashes and all aboard are killed. Who is saved? The Palestinian people!
Two Israelis are in an elevator when the doors open and a Palestinian gets on. After the doors close, the Palestinian lets out a huge, noisy fart. The doors open again and the Palestinian gets off. One Jew looks at the other, wipes his brow and says, "Thank God! Must have been a dud!"
What does the sign say above the nursery in a Palestinian maternity ward? "Live ammunition."
A Palestinian girl says to her mommy, "After Abdul blows up, can I have his room?"
--------------
Ba-boom-boom-CRASH!
(0) comments
A little too late, dude
"A Muslim convert, Roche was prepared to become an informant, his attorney says, and provide information about Al Qaeda; its Southeast Asian affiliate, Jemaah Islamiah; and their goal of staging an attack in a Western country.
But at the time — 14 months before the Sept. 11 attacks — no one was interested.
It wasn't until 2 1/2 years later that authorities decided to take Roche seriously and arrested him on terrorism charges. Last week he was sentenced to nine years in prison for conspiring with Al Qaeda leaders to blow up the Israeli Embassy in Canberra." ~
Before 9/11, One Warning Went Unheard
This is tantamount to Terry Nichols saying, after being convicted of his crimes, that he would have been willing to become an informant against Timothy McVeigh and Co. before the Oklahoma City Bombing in 1995, if only authorities would have listened to him.
You snooze, you lose, jackass. Now hold still while we inject the needle into your vein. We wouldn't want to cause an infection just seconds before you die and go to raghead heaven, now would we? *evil laughter*
"I had an Iraqi neighbor growing up: Al-Ahk-Ahk-Ahk-Bakh...he would give you the towel off his head." ~ Matthew Cooper, Deputy Washington Bureau Chief for Newsweek magazine
(0) comments
But at the time — 14 months before the Sept. 11 attacks — no one was interested.
It wasn't until 2 1/2 years later that authorities decided to take Roche seriously and arrested him on terrorism charges. Last week he was sentenced to nine years in prison for conspiring with Al Qaeda leaders to blow up the Israeli Embassy in Canberra." ~
Before 9/11, One Warning Went Unheard
This is tantamount to Terry Nichols saying, after being convicted of his crimes, that he would have been willing to become an informant against Timothy McVeigh and Co. before the Oklahoma City Bombing in 1995, if only authorities would have listened to him.
You snooze, you lose, jackass. Now hold still while we inject the needle into your vein. We wouldn't want to cause an infection just seconds before you die and go to raghead heaven, now would we? *evil laughter*
"I had an Iraqi neighbor growing up: Al-Ahk-Ahk-Ahk-Bakh...he would give you the towel off his head." ~ Matthew Cooper, Deputy Washington Bureau Chief for Newsweek magazine
(0) comments
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